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One of those days

One of those weeks…months… years… . I get it. Really, powers that be, I get it and now I’m just going to embrace the craziness that is my life. Why not? Nothing else is working.  There’s really no need to send bats swooping through my house to drive this point of yours home any further. I get it. 

Really, I’m sitting here writing expecting at any moment to have the bat (who we can’t seem to find since he made his entrance a bit ago) swoop over my head.  We get bats in the house every year.  I’ll never ever forget the first time which was about 2 weeks after we moved in. (Great welcome committee) I saw this brown thing perched on the quilt I had hanging on the wall in my office. I remember thinking, “Wow, they sure have some wicked moths out here”. Yeah right, a moth my ***.  Imagine my surprise when I went to remove it from my treasured quilt.  My son tried to tell me not to worry that he was sure the little guy was way more afraid of me than I was of him. Nope. Just not possible.

Since it happens every year, you’d think I’d have developed a thicker skin or have moved by now. Nope, not this girl. Every single time I start screaming, duck and run if possible. This time has been no different. Well… except I was calling my graphic designer Cassie and she answered the phone as I threw it down and ran screaming from the room.

I’m not proud. I’m not. When Cassie called back she said she was just about to get in the car and head this way or maybe call for help.

I’m sorry, Cassie.

Don’t get me wrong, I think bats are cool. They play an important role in that whole circle of life scheme of things and most certainly have a place on the planet. It’s just that their place is not in my house. Just not. And… I have yet to find where they are coming in. I think it’s’ the fan vent in the bathroom or the one in the hallway.  Really it’s a toss up between the two they are exactly alike. Honestly there’s a huge part of me that just doesn’t want to know. 

What if they are in the attic?

What if there are a whole lot of them up there? A flock? A gaggle? A herd? A colony!

See? Best not to know.

The last time this happened my friend Trudy told me that in certain Northwest tribal cultures a bat in your home is a sign of good fortune, the turning of a tide. Ok, so while I’m waiting for my tide to turn, I think I’m going to work out on the back deck. It’s warm, there’s internets and most probably no bats. They don’t love outside, do they?

Today we’re putting up the returning colours we’ve chosen (see below for a list of these) and 4 of the new oranges. I was going to put all of the oranges up but have been tweaking them for theme perfection, and then photographing them for hours. Seriously orange takes hours. Black and red a breeze compared to orange, my knitterly friends.  I finally figured out that it works best to put it on a contrasting background.

I have come to the realization that maybe, just maybe this might be too much orange to put forth onto the planet at one time. I’m concerned that it might whip up some sort of orange hurricane the likes of which has not been seen since that whole raven invasion. We all know what happened then. So I’m keeping Tigerlily and My Darlin’ Clemetine with me a little longer. I’m not quite ready to let them go just yet. I think I’m starting to like these little buggers. They’re even starting to look a little scummy.

Those of you that won the naming contest I have not forgotten you. I promise.

List of returning colourways:  Alina > Autumn > Alley Oop > Banded Agate > Basaan > Banded Agate > Blarneystone > Cockamamie > Cockeyed > Crabby McCrabbypants > Crazy Lace Agate > Gail”s Autumn Joy ( yippy) > Gypsum > Harlotty > Highway 30 > January One > Moss Agate > Mudslide > Mr. Green Jeans > Mystic Kelp > Oma Desala > Pirate’s Booty > Potomac > Rocktober > Rollingstone > Seal Rock > Tree Hugger.

New Colourways:  Tweety Bird > What’s Up Buttercup? > Orange you glad you aren’t a banana? > Peresephone’s Persimmon … .

They will go up late today. I need every extra second I can have these days. After all I am working under duress. 

Plus I think I need to go buy a butterfly net or a beekeepers hat.

24 Comments
  1. No such thing as too much orange. Never.

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  2. Bats, hmm, escaped from a local belfry I’m sure. When I was a kid we would throw rocks up in the air, no, not at the bats but so they would swoop and dive after them thinking the rocks were big insects to nosh. I like to watch them flitter in and out of my barn esp since they eat up to 500 mosquitoes an hour but I don’t like them in the house in any capacity. We found one in our unlit fireplace one time and my country raised daughter was thrilled to put on thick leather gloves and fetch it out. It was not a happy rodent. Made very LOUD angry sounds until released outside. Sadly for you they can squeeze into small cracks and openings, I hope you can find and eliminate their access to your space. Maybe call one of the local vermin eliminators. Hugs and sooo good to see you last at OFFF.

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  3. Knitasha1968 #

    Call the Discovery Channel and see if you can be featured on an episode of “Billy the Exterminator.” He already did an episode on bats, I think, but getting bats out of the belfry of the Depraved Dyer would really pull in the ratings, don’t you think?  grin

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  4. Naomi Rozell #

    Dear Tina,

    Oh

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  5. ditto that yippy for my Autumn Joy!! smile xoxo

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  6. I thought I heard a raccoon coming down the chimney last night. If it did, it didn’t make it all the way down and I hope it was able to climb back up again. Critter fritter!

    Bats have smaller teeth… But…

    I kept looking in the fireplace, sure I’d see those beady eyes and claws any moment.

    Good luck!

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  7. Josie McGill #

    Oh my goodness Tina, we have bats too!  They arrive when the weather warms in May and don’t leave until its too cold about Nov 1st when they go to caves to stay warm.  If they can get their little nose in a hole… they are in.  In between logs, down the kitchen fan outlet, we’ve even had two (twins I think) come into our bedroom at the same time.  I scream, duck and run or just duck under the covers til they find their way out again.  After 10 years of some pretty funny wild chases through the house (fun family times) now we just open the doors, cover our heads and wait for them to find their way out!!  Now we all recognize the bat scream, even my little chihuhua runs for cover when we say the “B” word!  You can put up bat houses, yes there is such a thing and that helps, they really are just trying to stay warm, but like you I wish they would do it someplace else!!  Blessings!  Love, Josie

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  8. Stacey #

    Don’t they eat moths?  If so, I can’t think of a better “pet” for someone who has lots (and lots) of fiber around.

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  9. alison #

    Here’s my bat story:  I had just finished closing in the frame of my tiny house (12 X 16) in the woods, and had enclosed the soffit under the eaves in time to beat the next day’s rain.  I had pulled up a lawn chair close to the wall, settled back intending to relax with a book when I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder.  As I had been working alone, that was startlement enough, but when I looked around in alarm what I saw was a small brown bat clinging to my shoulder.  I remember seeing the tiny face, the thick brown fur, and the most delicate wing claws clutching my jacket.  Of course I shot up out of the chair and in the confusion the bat fell off me, then struggled up and fluttered away.  I’ve no idea where it came from or why it was out in the daylight–maybe it had just escaped being nailed into the soffit.  Never saw another one.

    They do love the outside–just at night when there are more bugs around, and when the bugs can’t see them coming.  My mum used to chase them out of the house with a badminton raquet–my sister and I would hide under the covers until it was all over.

    PS–orange is excellent!

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  10. Hmmm Back in Nicaragua, at my grandmothers house wich was large and drafty with very tall ceilings and walls made out of adobe.. at least the front of the house. The walls did not quite reach the ceiling. They were sort of open.  It was dark and cool. Nicaragua is very humid.

    In this part of the house we had bats.  I could hear them flying and chirping.  It was hard to sleep some nights. I was 7 or 8 at the time.

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  11. Or a tennis racket!  I’m an animal lover but a bat in my house is another….well…animal.

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  12. Alice in the Heartland #

    Yep been there done that. One was perched on a curtain rod and DH was already in bed when I turned on the lights and asked him to get up and remove it. His response: “Turn out the lights and let it sleep.” Then he got up and used a paint can to catch the critter. It left bat prints on the porch as it departed.

    And to KateinIowa we have +2 tennis rackets around here. All the better for vampire gerbils that run around in a friend’s dungeon.

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  13. Deb Leary #

    If you go up in the attic and peek over the edge of the floor, you will see light through a gap between the roof and the attic joists.  You can trust me on this if you don’t want to go up there while bats are sleeping during the day!  Go up after dark when they have gone out cruising, and sprinkle a couple of boxes of moth balls around the edges of the attic.  The smell will discourage them.  Also, be sure you have a good seal around the door that leads upstairs to the attic.  Once in a while one gets confused and squeezes under the door trying to find the way outside.  We have lots of bats in our city neighborhood and this works for us.  I agree that bats are cool, but they just don’t belong in my house!

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  14. Trudianne Temple #

    The easiest and most effective bat solution is open a window. It wants out of your house more than you want it out. Trust me. Nothing to eat in the house.

    They have perfect sonar and will find an open window all by themselves every time. No tennis rackets, no butterfly nets, no badminton rackets, no animal control…

    Just close the door to that room, open a window and let the poor dear fly peacefully out.

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  15. Hazel Smith #

    According to Amelia Peabody Emmerson, bats inhabit the pyramids at Giza so you might want to rethink a trip to Egypt. I once found a bat lying on the sidewalk outside a shopping center(day time). I brought him home and released him in my yard. He clung to the side of the house in the shade until night and then disappeared. He had the cutest little face.

    I’m glad the new colours are up Tina, but am a little disappointed that you’re hanging onto Tigerlily. I want a piece of that action.

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  16. Mya #

    All that orange makes me want an orange whip http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1oOv3cuP8M4

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  17. Sam #

    Oh, girl, do I feel you on the bats.  I couldn’t have been more than 14 or so when we found a bat flying around in our house.  We all chased it around the house trying to get it to escape out of a window, any window.  It finally flew into my parents bedroom and all four of us kids ran in after it……only to have my parents CLOSE the door behind us.  I still haven’t forgiven them.  Especially after listening to them laugh their asses off just outside the door.

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  18. I understand that you are afraid of them, I would be too! Hope they dont come into your house in the future!

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  19. Donna Emberson #

    I’m laughing with you and not at you, honestly! I grew up in an old barn like house that had bats…my mother kept a badminton racket and fishing net beside her bed and yes…when us kids would call her about a bat, she would grab both and net the bat and then beat it into submission with the racket…she also carried a brown paper bag to put the body into. I woke up once to two hanging off the ceiling above my bed…yes, traumatic, since my mother wouldn’t let me get out of bed because I might scare them away…so I had to hide under the covers during her lethal attack!And if you’re thinking I grew up in some backwoods area…WRONG, this was just outside Caledon Ontario! About half hour north of Toronto…so, I know what you’re going through!

    Enjoy your day,

    Donna

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  20. My dh’s brother spent some time in Trinidad & Tobago, and he and a friend went down to some bat caves one evening.  Knowing him, he was probably intent on catching one.  But, no dice.  They waved their arms around as fast as they could, bats flying as thick as gnats over the lawn on a summer evening, and didn’t even brush a single solitary one.  Those suckers’ sonar is darn good, and they really don’t like whacking into things.

    Hopefully that’ll help some.

    Can’t wait to see the oranges!

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  21. So I take it bat-central is now under control?  YIKES!  Stay cool.  Thinking of you.  Love you as always.

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  22. Dyepotgirl #

    OMG!!! I’m so with you!! I just read all the bat stories and thought I would share one of mine. I was working in a resort town in upstate New York during the summer as a cook in my late teens. As you can imagine it was hot in the kitchen and at night after work, my friends and I would often go swimming at a local resort’s pool. I was 19, tall, and had really long thick hair that reached my hips. We were walking home after going swimming in the pool at about 10:30 at night. Along this street there were really pretty, old fashioned, wrought iron street lights that were about 8 feet tall. It was a hot evening and my hair was sticking to my back so I flipped my hair forward and went to flip it back while I was walking under one of the street lights. At the same moment I went to flip my hair back, a bat flew under the street light to catch a bug and got caught in my hair. I freaked out! My friends freaked out! I screamed! The bat screamed!!! It was pandemonium and total panic! Anyone who has long hair knows how hard it can be to get something out of it and it’s 10 times worse when it’s wet. Finally a friend took charge, doubled up her towel, and got the poor bat out of my hair and set it free. It seemed to take forever but it really only took about 4 minutes to separate the bat from my hair. I was a shivering, crying, traumatized wreck. Since that day I instinctively duck and cover whenever I see a bat that’s close to me.

    I’ve also had several in my house and have managed to get them out, but only after I braided my hair and covered my head with a blanket. My family thought it was the funniest thing they had ever seen, but I was terrified and thought I was being very brave to get the bat out of my house. The scariest part for me is that since I had a really bad reaction to a series of vaccines, I can no longer get any vaccinations so if I ran into a rabid bat, it would be a very serious medical situation. My indoor cat caught what I thought was a mouse about 6 years ago and I didn’t realize that he had actually caught a bat until after I had taken it from him. I had to take it to the health department to have it tested for rabies. It was a very long and scary week, but the poor bat was clean. After that we went around the house plugging up any and all areas where we thought they might get into the house and haven’t had a bat indoors since. (Knock on wood!!!) So, bats and I aren’t the best of friends. I know that they are important and all, but I like them best when I can’t see them or they are really high up in the sky doing their bat thing. As long as we keep our distance, we can coexist, but inside the house is my territory! I hope that your bats vacate the premises quickly and you can find out how they get in and block their entrances. I definitely understand the whole running and screaming thing. I’m not the type of girl who has a lot of “girlie” fears. Mice, snakes, spiders and the like don’t worry me at all, but bats are definitely in a whole other category!!!

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  23. Bats are really amazing creature if you study up on them.

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  24. Janey #

    My bat story – ‘cause I’m not a fan of orange.

    There was one in my parent’s cottage and I was volunteered to remove it.

    It flew around some and finally went upstairs, where it clung to a wall. I “snuck up” on it with a bath-towel in hand, thinking to capture in the folds of the cloth and release it outside. (Not a very well-thought out plan because the only way down was via a rickety ladder, which required both hands to navigate. The two windows upstairs were not openable from the inside – an incompetent or drunk carpenter had installed the screen windows backwards.)

    Did you know that bats have very mesmerizing eyes? I was looking at its eyes when I brought the towel forward to capture it. And missed completely!

    (The bat took off, flew down to the main floor, and after a few minutes managed to find the open door on its own.)

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