Hello dear ones,
Wow I feel like I have been trying to write this post for weeks now. Sadly writing seems to take a back seat to all the other jobs right now. I am on this mission to be caught up before my birthday which is the 29th of this month so I’ve chained myself to the dye table and pots. Honestly not a bad thing, kinky maybe though. lol It just leaves little room for anything else besides shipping and such. I would say more about seeing light at the end of the tunnel but in all honesty I do not want to jinx it. I am not going to test the powers that be on this one.
To all of you that have asked, I doing well. I got my second vaccine a week ago so I have another week and then I get to hug my son and daughter-in-law (daughters are on the east coast right now) . I am so excited I can’t even. The lack of hugging for this hug loving person has been more than a little painful.
While this past year has been hard and painful of many different levels (and more so for some of us than others based on our level of privilege) there has also been some pretty illuminating and inspiring moments for me. It’s quite a bit and I do have a lot to say about it, most certainly more than one blog post worth. So consider this post a beginning. As with any process there’s layers and depths to plummet and shine a little light on. I have been pretty quiet about it all except to close friends and family so I could make the most of this opportunity ~ do the work it took ~ appreciate it all, and be in the moment presented to me.
As most of you know I have for the most part been alone for the better part of all of this. Well…actually, alone except for Valla the Maine Coon cat, a whole flock of chickens and my own little bunny warren plus whatever other wildlife shows up. Before the pandemic I was used to spending 5 days a week with at least 4 other people (Team Blue Moon) and sometimes more than that. A whole lot of differing energies and personalities. Since I am a people person it was not a huge challenge. Although I will say the whole ~ being an employer part ~ is quite a lot of work no matter who the employees are.
The pandemic hits and we shut down and I find myself alone. I feel like I am good at being alone. I enjoy my own company. However this was different and it was quite a hard transition to make. I certainly had more bad days than good ones in the beginning. Especially with all of the stress that went with figuring out how to do run Blue Moon all alone. A lot of the jobs here I had not done for awhile so I had to retrain myself and find the most efficient way run systems as one.
At the very beginning all the ~ silence of space ~ felt empty and pretty lonely. So I attempted to fill that space. I started to listen to podcasts, audio-books and so very much music. Which kept me compnay of sorts and gave me the support I needed to be a little more comfortable to do the work and to move on to whatever was next. I have so much much gratitude to; Per Bristow, David Chang, Jonathan Van Ness, Layla F Saad, Brene’ Brown, BTS, SHINEE, Nikita Gil, Rumi, Lindy West, Sanjay Gupta MD, Samin Nosrat, Tommy Orange, Padma Laksshmi, Junauda Petrus, Michael Twitty, Alice Walker, Morat, Eckoes, Isaac Lee, Kim Hyung Jung, Common, and so very many more. Thank you all and to all of the brave souls who share yourselves, gifts and insights with us all. Thank you for the comfort and and for the illuminating inspiration and growth.
Once I acclimated myself to the new work schedule & all the space that was just mine I noticed something. I realized that even though it was a whole lot of work and it certainly has been, I felt more content and even happy than I had in years. I started to reconnect with parts of myself that I had not experienced in such a long time. I had been so busy making sure everything around me worked for everyone around me that I had neglected me. Something that a whole lot of women can relate to especially single mothers. I could actually hear myself and I was listening!
My creative life started ~ way back when ~ with music. I played clarinet, guitar and dulcimer and also sang. Music was my life’s blood. I was also a sound engineer, a job I truly loved. All wonderfully fulfilling until one day I had a very freak accident with hydraulic rollers that smashed my left hand ending my instrument playing for what I thought would be forever. I was devastated and I could not envision how to make it all work with a smashed hand. So I walked away. Yup, I shut down that part of myself and I packed my life up and moved out west to Olympia Washington with my girlfriend at the time and my sister and her girlfriend and started anew. Yeah probably not the best response.
I love music, all kinds and I listen to music ALL the time. Until a few years ago I still sang quite a bit. All of my kids sing and a few play instruments. One of the gifts that this space of time has blessed me with is that heart and soul connection with music I had when I was younger. I finally grieved 40 years later and my heart broke right open into song. I picked up one of the guitars I have and started playing again just for me. It’s a challenge but that’s okay, it still feels so very good. I am also singing ALL the time which feels so good. Did you know that chickens love to be sung to? it’s pretty hysterical. They cock their little heads and some of them will bob them and hum. Yes chickens hum.
Okay so this is getting real long so I am going to make a bit of a leap here so I can bring in color and yarn. I promise to fill in the spaces and share more of this process with you soon. I am learning so very much everyday that I am excited about and want to share with you. Based on the y dye chemist I work with recommendation I decided to learn chemistry. Yup! I want a greater understanding so I can do more with color and I LOVE it! Color Chemist me!!!
Also…I have always wanted to learn another language but was told by a few teachers that I did not have an affinity for it so I gave up. Why do we do this to children trying to learn. I decided to try again and because of my love of kpop music I chose Korean and ya know what I am not to bad at it either. Hoping to at some point to also try Japanese. Right now I think most of the music I am listening to is not in my own language. You get more of an appreciation for the voice as an instrument and language, especially lyrical and melodic ones, as an actual part of the score and not just words with a message (not to discount that aspect though) . There’s a French artist I am listening to right now that I am so moved by I often find myself tearing up into the yarn. A little extra!!
As I rediscover and heal all of these parts of myself and find new ones I’m incorporating it into the work I do with color, yarn and design. Life is energy. Color and music share the vibrations of life. Some days I have a fair amount of clarity and a clear vision and path of how this all feels and looks. And then there are days where I feel like a conduit and it’s my job just to get out of the way of all of this energy and let it flow through me. Honestly those are my best days! I feel like there just not enough hours in the day I feel so deeply inspired and moved.
I have stopped filling that silence of space. I now sit in that space and do my best to be present in each moment no matter what they hold. I get to experience so many things that would just pass me by. A privilege for sure and one I am grateful for.
I promised new colorways a few weeks ago. I have been waiting on this until being more caught up. Below are some of the colorways that have come out of all of this exploration. ( And there are so many more to come). I am in the process of adding them to the website. It will take me all weekend, it’s a big job and I dye during the day so… . If you feel the need to order before I get them up you can do so by ordering whatever base you want in the Snowflake colorway and then in the notes section of your order put the colorway name you want. Please read the descriptions on each colorway so you can understand their source inspiration and I can credit what I was inspired by.
I hope you enjoy knitting with these as much as I did creating them. While I love them all my favorites are; LOKI, Atlantis , SHINee’s back (been a HUGE SHINee fan for years), and My Euphoria which is different than the RSC one I sent out!! I have contacted a few musicians that I am going to work with composing color and sound so look for that soon. I am pretty excited!!!!
Before I head out to the dye barn this morning I want to again thank you all for your continued patience and support over the last 22 years, especially for that past year. I grateful for each and everyone one of you! I hope you all are taking care, staying safe and getting vaccinated.
Oh also a word on USPS. They are over worked and stressed! Ours PO is a small town one that is under staffed and are doing their very best. Amazon will do their own deliveries out here until they get complaints about deliveries that are missed are just wrong. The cell service out here is not the best so they can’t scan. Once Amazon gets enough complaints they stop delivering out here and then just dump it all on the PO with no warning. It’s a lot so if we can be patient and understanding.
Here is Connie our USPS worker who is a gem!!
Okay off I go! Have a lovely weekend!